28th November 2016
by Marie Holden
Christmas, pistachio, Workplace
At Pistachio, we are an equal opportunities employer and when the chance came along to hire one of Santa’s elves as Head of Snow-cial media, we jumped at the chance.
It all started so well, Rudelf (Rudy for short), was quick to gel with the team, taking sELFies and joining in with beer o’clock. He seemed to be taking his responsibilities very seriously, he set up Instagram and posted with some fun and engaging content on Facebook and Twitter.
But it soon snowballed out of control when Rudy posted some inappropriate images of a night out, at the weekend, across our social media.
Marie Holden, Creative Director, commented “We were all deeply concerned on viewing the images and explicit content, we decided to contact Rudelf’s previous employer, Santa.”
“It’s obviously a busy time of year for Santa, but he replied with a swift ‘Ho, ho, hi’. He remembered Rudy and said he had a problem with low elf esteem. He had a good voice and was a great wrapper and had worked hard on his elf-abet at school, but he had a very naughty streak”
“Rudy’s drinking became a problem and he started smoking, even though it was bad for his elf. Santa tried to send him to a Elf Farm but it did no good. He picked up Tinsilitis and posted Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay. Luckily they didn’t sell because they were two deer”
“He also ordered 200 pizzas to be delivered to the North Pole, they were deep pan, crisp and even, but Santa was stuck with the bill, while Rudy played Apostles’ Creed on the Xbox. The final candy stick came when Rudy stole Santa’s pride and joy, his Holly Davidson”
So, after our conversation with Santa, and his recent behaviour we felt we had little choice but to terminate Rudelf’s employment with immediate effect.